wuji.txt

[flauntist]

₁. I don't like sad things. I do like drinking, though.

₂. I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.

₃. Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.

₄. I’ve had the same dream about you three times in a row, is that weird?

₅. This is my life now. I have climbed this hill and now I will die upon it.

₆. Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOUR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE.

₇. Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.

₈. What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.

₉. You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death.

₁₀. I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.